Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Sweet Mother of...

I swear to God I fell out of the womb and that is that last time my mother remembered where I was coming from & who I was with. Since then it’s been a series of “Oh you’re home early”s , “Who is that again?”s and “I can’t remember everything you tell me.”s.

I’m seriously considering just stopping to tell her things until they are actually happening or right after. Like today, as I left this morning I said “Mom, I will most likely do pilates while the baby sleeps so I’ll come right home after work.” Her response when I walked in the door “oh your home early.” When reminded of the last thing I said before leaving in the AM. “I can’t remember everything you do.”

But the thing is, she wants to know everything that I do. We affectionately (relative!) call her “The Closer” because if there is a piece of information that she wants to know, she will not stop until she does. Even if it annoys you to the brink of murder. I’ve been lucky enough to walk away at this time, but my sister is definitely going to be the one that breaks.

If ever anyone calls to say they aren’t coming to something she’ll ask “why?” and when I never have an answer because it’s never my business she always goes to her standby “Why wouldn’t you ask?” Because I don’t care!!!

She’s amazing, I'm waiting for her USA detective show to premiere. (Kind of like Monk or Psych.)

But as far as my friends are concerned, I need to have a photo and description on hand before relaying any story of any event. Especially with my male friends, because she can never keep up (in her defense they are changing often - But just please start a running log or something!) Every time I tell any story I always have to have a short intermission where I go through exactly how I know them & how she can make the connection. "Oh, yeah, I remember now. The little one."

And that's another thing, apparently I'm only friends with guys that are smaller than me. Apparently I'm a giant. Thanks mom.

1 comment:

  1. My mom finally broke down and starting writing my schedule on a calendar. Texting her details also helped, because she could check her phone if she forgot.